poetry
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I leaned in just to lay my head on his shoulder and it gutted me the softness that I could lean in and rest and not have to think – I need your mind to respond – I need you to manage to be a trauma dumping ground – I need you to fix not…
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They gnawed Fraying the rope between my heart and his Their teeth sharpened with doubt, fear and buried insecurities of “do I measure up?”
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The refrain made the first tear fall Love was so strong, at least at the beginning Who would’ve thought there’d be an ending I didn’t, but by the time the chorus was on, I knew that the universe conspired That song, that time, as if I didn’t know And tried to pretend that maybe, just…
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Every time You put me in the untenable position to say yes when it really is a no And ask me Do I still Am I still Would I still No Little by little It was lost chipped when you derided devalued denied used gas to light me instead of lighting the spark required overcare…
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What does it mean that I found love, but lost my pen? That the words can’t come. Won’t spill out of my head spewing everywhere Did happiness stop me? Unconcious, did I gut myself emptying the bowels of letters that rearranged themselves in my head? 525,600 characters lost to love
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The weight was heavy with frustration, anger, doubt on a bar made of pain but I benched it until failure Exhausting my muscles Tired of adulting Tired of carrying my burdens on my shoulders because I carried yours on my back Tired of begging for the smallest thing I napped away my pain to get…
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Did he know? Know she was a Tigress and kept herself in a cage because even the glimpse of her stripes aroused fear and insecurities in animals that were prey Was he ready? Ready to tame a wild beast with a whip and a command Instead of her roars, elicit her purrs Instead of jagged…
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Baby, who taught you how to love? Loss… *written by MAJH

