Wandering & Wondering

It was the love story that was never meant to be. She was too old, too grey, too fat, used up, and whatever else the red pill mafia told her.

Not that she believed it. But still certain insecurities weighed on her mind as she watched KermitCrashOut at 12:12am and understood Kermit’s need to alternate between dancing to trap and uncontrollable crying

She didn’t know what she wanted, only that it involved care and intimacy. For too long, she buried her feelings because nobody really ever cared for her. Love her yes. Even adore her. But to take the time to really see her. Listen to her. Pay attention to her. In an intimate way. She had friends who showed her what care was so she had a blueprint of philia. Eros eluded. She was tired. Tired of having to chase and ask and not just be able to be told. You’re pretty. I think you’re sexy. I love the way your skin feels. I adore the way you care for me. Tired of begging for scraps of attention, or only getting attention when they needed to trauma dump.